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Vampires Do Exist--a mental health post

1/6/2021

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Vampires do exist and you've probably encountered one. I'm referring to energy vampires. Energy vampires are people who have a pattern of draining your emotional energy. Everyone has bad days, but there are distinguishing characteristics and patterns of behavior that set the energy vampire apart. There are different types and they fall on a spectrum. Regardless of the type or where they fall on the spectrum, they all have one thing in common: they feed on people who will listen and care for them. People who are empathetic, supportive, sensitive and compassionate are prime targets for energy vampires. Learning to spot them is important because constant exposure to them can eventually take its toll on our emotional, mental and physical health.

Take a look at the people surrounding you. Some will inspire you while some will "perspire" you. This easiest way to recognize this is to pay attention to how you feel after spending time with someone. More often than not, do you walk away feeling happy and energized or do you walk away feeling depleted and drained? Your body is wired to protect you, so take notice of what your body feels around certain people.

To be clear, I'm not talking about friends supporting each other through hard times. I'm not talking about friends having bad days and occasionally needing to vent (and there is a distinct difference between venting and dumping). We all ought to have a solid social circle of support that we can look to for encouragement and positive energy. But I'm not talking about any of that...I'm talking about people who take advantage of their relationships and who turn the aspects of a healthy, supportive social circle into an unhealthy dynamic. I'm talking about people who display patterns and cycles of behavior that are toxic or unhealthy. Time will always tell the difference.

They may be charming, charismatic, outgoing and fun to be around, but energy vampires always have another side to them that you cannot turn a blind eye to. They may often live in crisis mode or in the midst of drama. They may swing high and low with emotional ups and downs and have a propensity for turning every fun night out into an inevitable tear filled therapy session. They may often have a pattern of shirking personal responsibility for their crises and believe nothing is their fault. They often lack self-awareness including the awareness of their self-defeating patterns. They may be a melodramatic "damsel in distress" type or the "woe is me" victim type who seeks out others to fulfill their needs or provide solutions. They essentially prey on the energy and vitality of others as an attempt to heal their own inner suffering. There may be an element of codependency. Make sure you are not feeding back into this dysfunctional dynamic. They may perceive YOU as the solution to their problems; however, the important thing to remember is that you are NOT responsible for resolving their issues. It is not up to you to be a "fixer". While you may offer help and support, it is ultimately their responsibility to sort out their struggles. On that point, learn to recognize if they are truly striving to be solution oriented or if they seem to be content remaining in their drama and struggles. If you are recycling the same repetitive, draining conversations with them over and over and nothing ever changes, then they might not be truly interested in solutions. Instead, it may be a vicious cycle that they are stuck in and you do not have to be stuck in the cycle along with them. Get off the dysfunctional merry-go-round.

Learn to recognize these types of people. Learn how to draw the line and set boundaries. Learn to say "NO". Protect your space. Protect your time. Protect your energy. Recognizing these behaviors and putting an end to it is critical to protecting yourself, your health and your overall wellbeing. This is self-care and self-care is not selfish. This does not make you a bad or unsupportive friend. Support is not about constantly allowing yourself to serve as a sounding board or a door mat. Support does not mean feeling responsible for offering solutions to someone who is not interested in solutions. Support does not mean supporting and enabling poor behaviors. Support does not mean playing the constant role of therapist. Sometimes it is necessary to limit or eliminate your contact with certain people who drain you. Surround yourself with people who are good for your mental health--those who promote a positive, healthy and happy life--those who will build good and positive energy in you. And make sure that you give good energy back.

Lastly, we always ought to self-reflect, so take a hard, honest look inward and make sure that you are not the energy vampire. Don't be a sucker...but, if you realize that you are, it doesn't mean that you are a bad person, but you may have unhealthy patterns that are bad for you and the people close to you. The good news is that you can change things, starting now...but it's up to you! The first step to change is always awareness. The second step is acceptance. And the third step, is ACTION.

If you can relate to this post in any way, it is my hope that this has been helpful! 
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Cliche but true...thoughts as we begin a new year

1/5/2021

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Vicious cycles — the new year is the perfect time to contemplate this topic. It’s a brand new year, so why would we want to bring last year’s “stuff” into this year? Let’s not keep doing more of the same if we want something different. Let’s reset and refocus.

But first, let’s look inward and really self-reflect...

What vicious cycles are we “stuck” in? What insanity are we perpetuating? Albert Einstein probably didn’t even say this famous quote that is attributed to him and although it’s an overused cliche, it’s absolutely true. Why do we do the same things over and over and expect different results? Are we really insane? No, we’re just human. Human beings are creatures of routine. And as humans, we naturally we seek comfort. Change is not comfortable. For most of us, it is challenging to try different approaches to the problems in our life or to take action in the areas we wish to change so we get “stuck” doing what comes easiest or we get “stuck” repeating the same cycles over and over.


As cliché as the quote is, it still holds true. If you want different results than what you’re getting, then you have to do something different. The things you did yesterday have brought you to the life you have today. If you want something different, then you have to do something different today to create a different life tomorrow. There’s no other way to get there. If nothing changes, then nothing changes. It's so simple yet so hard for most of us.

​Whether it’s your career, relationships, thinking patterns, behaviors or habits you wish to change, it’s up to you to do it. And even though it may feel like you’re stuck, no one is stuck where they are unless they decide they are stuck—it's a choice. We choose to stay “stuck”. "Stuck" is a state of mind and the way we think has a huge impact on how we act. If you think that you are stuck, then you are less likely to take any action. Your mindset is what is stuck...it essentially paralyzes you from acting. Realize that stuck is a “feeling” much like “hungry” or “cold” — it is impermanent and changeable. It can be heavy and it can pull you down, but it is not cement and it is not forever—you can break out and break free. Life is too incredible and amazing to stay stuck in a rut. So, whatever it is that makes you feel “stuck”, realize that you have the power to make a change at any moment in your life and that you are exponentially stronger than you think!
We often resist change because change can be hard. Change is not easy but it is possible! 

Never stop trying— but maybe it’s just time to try again in a different way or to simply start over. It's never too late. And it's a new year, but you don't need a new year...every single moment is a new opportunity and a fresh start.

​Bottom line:
​If we want different outcomes, then our choices and actions must reflect that.
Simple concept but not easy.
​Don’t stay stuck. Break the vicious cycle. Live your best life.
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Requirements for Success

11/12/2020

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Effective Strength Training Splits

11/12/2020

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Effective Strength Training Splits:

There are many options to choose from as shown in the image below and you’re not just limited to these examples. You can see how various training splits can be structured per these examples.

However, which type of split and training frequency provides the most benefit?
My simple answer: the one you can stick to.

But, personally, I’ve been reaping huge rewards from a Push (chest, shoulders, triceps) / Pull (back, rear delts, biceps) / Legs (including calves) routine with core built into every session. Hitting every major muscle group twice per week is an optimal growth stimulus.
Note: I only do legs once per week because I cycle 3-4 times per week which is taxing on the legs.
Don’t forget to rest! Recovery is a crucial part of progress!

My current schedule (just for reference) looks like this:
Monday: Push “Routine A” / Cycle 45 min
Tuesday: Pull “Routine A” / Cycle 45 min
Wednesday: Rest Day
Thursday: Push “Routine B” / Cycle 45 min
Friday: Pull “Routine B” / Cycle 45 min
Saturday: Legs
Sunday: Rest Day

Feel welcome to post or send questions! Happy to help if you’re wondering how to set up a program.
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Step Up Your Cardio Game

7/5/2020

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Cardio Tip: Interval Training

Interval training is hard. Interval training is uncomfortable. And...well, it’s just better. In simple terms, interval training is a method of conditioning that alternates periods of work with periods of recovery—it’s the opposite of steady state cardio. Interval training develops aerobic capacity better than steady state aerobic training. The fastest way to raise VO2 max, our standard measure of aerobic fitness is through interval training.

Side note: steady state cardio definitely has its place—great for recovery or if you’re an endurance athlete, then long steady state training is very important.

The complicated part of interval training is figuring out the rest and work ratios. But it doesn’t have to be complicated if you use heart rate.

I prefer heart rate based methods of dictating work to rest ratios as opposed to arbitrary time based intervals because with time based intervals, we have no idea what’s happening inside the body and we may either work TOO hard or not hard enough—it’s easy to either over work and under rest or under work and over rest. Get yourself a heart rate monitor and use that — to use this method, have an idea of your max heart rate and select an appropriate recovery heart rate—I use 60% of theoretical max heart rate as my recovery. Note—if you use a HR calculator/formula to calculate your max HR, understand that at least 70% of the population does not fit into the theoretical calculations of the commonly used 220–age maximum heart rate formula. My actual max HR is higher than the formula based max HR for my age—I know this because, well I’ve exceeded the formula based maxHR and I’m still here. Do the formula based version anyway to have a ballpark idea. Note your heart rate immediately after completing your first hard work interval. During a HIIT work effort, you want to hit 80% or more of your estimated max HR. The recovery is set by the time it takes to return back to the recovery heart rate (~55-60% max HR). You’ll notice that initial recovery after the first interval may be rapid, but subsequent intervals may require slightly longer rest periods.

How many intervals should you do? Start small and build up—your first several sessions might include only 3 total intervals. And then, you might add an extra interval for several more sessions. Gradually, you can build up your total number of intervals. Note: up to 20-30 total HIIT session minutes is sufficient — you don’t need to go beyond this.

When to do it? I usually do 10-15 total minutes right after a strength training workout (rest is included in the total time so actual work time might only be 5-7 minutes).

Find a modality you enjoy—I love sled push sprints. The AirDyne Bike is great too—it’s probably one of the best modalities because it’s non-impact, safe for everyone and uses both the legs & arms effectively raising heart rate. Mix it up though—don’t always do the same thing—have a few options to rotate through—battle ropes and sleds, treadmill or track sprints, Assault Bike (AirDyne) sprints, etc. I do not recommend elliptical machines or stair climbers for HIIT/interval training.

VERY IMPORTANT— WARM UP THOROUGHLY BEFORE INTERVAL TRAINING

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EXERCISE AND MEDICATION MAY REQUIRE YOU TO ADJUST YOUR HEART RATE. A common example is a group of drugs called beta-blockers, prescribed for patients with heart problems and high blood pressure. This drug reduces both the resting and exercise heart rate, although not always by the same amount. In some cases, a person can workout much harder without the heart rate elevating even into the aerobic zone. In this case, exercising at 125 beats per minute, for example, may be the same as 155 without the medication—so if your max aerobic heart rate is 140, you can easily be overtraining at 125. In fact, some people are unable to attain their max aerobic heart rate while on a beta-blocker. Anti-arrhythmic drugs, calcium channel blockers, and other medications can sometimes reduce exercise heart rate as well. If you’re taking any prescription or over-the-counter drug, you should know whether it affects the heart rate. Some drugs raise the heart rate. These include thyroid medication, Ritalin and other amphetamines, and even caffeine, which is found in certain cold remedies, pain relievers, and, of course, coffee, tea, and some sodas. These drugs will often cause higher exercise heart rates, forcing you to slow down to maintain your maximum aerobic heart rate. This means that by following your heart rate you may have to reduce your exercise intensity.

NOTE: Before beginning any training regimen, make sure it is medically safe for you to do so. If you have any injury, disease, disability or other concerns about starting an exercise program, consult your healthcare provider first.

Questions always welcomed! And I’m always happy to take you through a conditioning workout!
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Home Workouts: Mini Band Exercises Part 1

4/25/2020

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Mini Band Exercise Series:
What can you do with mini-bands? So much! If you’ve been in one of my exercise groups, then you’ll be familiar with these bands. Attached are 3 exercise videos using mini bands and I’ll post more next week. Then, we’ll use exercises from this series to put together a complete workout!

Where do you find these? You can get them on Amazon delivered straight to your door! I have the Synergee Mini Band multipack. This brand is a little higher priced but shop around-you don’t need to spend a lot —just search for mini bands on Amazon. You’ll need some med/heavy bands for lower body and lighter bands for upper body.

Exercise Form Cues:

Mini Band Deadlifts:

Bend knees slightly, hinge forward from hips until chest is almost parallel to the floor, keeping back naturally straight and abs in tight. You should feel a slight stretch in your hamstrings in the "down" position. Maintaining straight spine, engage your glutes to bring body back to start position

Mini Band Bent Over Back Row:

In a hinged position, row the mini bands up to your side, pulling with your back and driving your elbow back and up as you row. Keep your core tight as you row

Mini Band Stationary Lunges:

Be sure to keep your chest lifted, chin up and abs contracted so your back stays straight. During the lunge, make sure you’re balanced on your back toes and your front knee is in line with your ankle. Squeeze your glutes as you rise. If your knees bother you, decrease the depth to which you lunge. Only lunge in a pain free range of motion.
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Circuit of Steel

4/16/2020

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All exercises can be performed with dumbbells, kettlebells, weight plates or resistance bands. If you don’t have any of those, then get creative! Use a backpack or fill up a jug of water and use that as your weight. A full gallon of water is heavy!

All exercises can be modified so please let me know if you need modifications or if you have any questions.


There are 3 parts to this workout. Each part is performed 3 times. This will take you 40-45 minutes.

If you try it, let me know!
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Equipment Free Pyramid Workout

4/11/2020

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Here’s an equipment free workout that you can do anywhere!

Substitutions / Modifications:

Burpees — substitutions (kettlebell swings; jumping jacks; jump squats; if jumping bothers your knees—take out the jump and do modified jacks or a squat to calf raise)

Pushups: Modify on knees or perform on an elevated surface or try wall pushups

Sit-up — substitutions (any style crunch or plank)

Air Squats (aka: bodyweight squats) — substitutions (Glute Bridge; Hip Thrusts; Wall Sit)

Mountain Climber — substitutions (high knees; plank with alternating side to side toe taps)

Get creative! This is only a template! Make up your own workouts with your own exercise ideas using the pyramid template!
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Share your workouts with me if you try it!
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Full Body Outdoor Circuit

4/10/2020

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Part 1–
20 Reps per exercise
Goblet Squat
Single Arm KB/DB/Band Row
Lunges
SPRINT (one straightaway) & Jog Back
REST & REPEAT X 3

Part 2-
Bicep Curls (Dumbbells, KBs, or Bands)
Upright Row
Hammer Curls
SPRINT (one straightaway) & Jog Back
REST & REPEAT X 3

Part 3-
KB Swings X 20
Abs x 20—mix it up (med ball & mat)
REST & REPEAT X 3
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No Gym, No Problem: 5 Equipment Free Workouts

4/3/2020

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